the skinny

Dear Diary

October 31, 2014

Maybe this is on my mind because it is Halloween and I just want to eat my weight in candy, but I’ve been thinking about the importance placed on weight as a blogger.

My gal pal and I were chatting and she brought up a great point. If you are a size 24, you get an outpouring of support and feedback like “be you girl!,” or “be proud of who you are” (which is up lifting and I love it). If you are a size 2, you get an outpouring of support saying how beautiful and stunning you are (which again, is wonderful. I love support). For those that fall just outside of being a 6 and just under being a 20, it can be a tough ride (and for the record, I’m a 6, so this isn’t about bitterness, it’s about confusion). Why is there such a stigma on “medium-sized” girls? I seriously don’t understand it.

And for the record, telling a skinny girl that she looks so skinny, isn’t always a compliment. Some girls wish they could gain weight and they can’t. Telling a bigger girl that she “wears it well,” or some other crazy back-handed compliment probably gets old after a little bit.

I think it is especially hard for girls that fluctuate in weight. I can guarantee that if your weight is fluctuating or you’ve just flat put on a few pounds, you know that without someone telling you and it makes it amplified when someone takes it on themselves to point it out to you.

I totally understand that if you put yourself out there, on the internet, you lend yourself to opinions and unwarranted advice, that is just part of it, but I guess I didn’t realize how much focus put on weight until I started blogging and started meeting more bloggers who struggle with it.

The positive part of this for me is that I am way more aware of how I lend advice or share compliments. Everyone has their own struggles and just being supportive is so important, so I try to leave positive comments on different blogs regularly. You never know who needs a little reminder how special they are.

For everyone else, Meghan Trainor has it under control.

4 comments

  1. Katherine Williams says:

    I was checking out your blog and am just now seeing the dairy section (and this post) and amen!! I have pretty severe body issues (like anxiety and previously really unhealthy habits that are always in the back of my mind). I have learned that we are more than that one part of us, though this lesson is sometimes easy for me to forget and struggle with. Thank you for sharing- this was a good reminder for me!

    • paperyrain says:

      Kat,
      I literally just saw this, I am so sorry for not responding sooner. Well since I know you personally, I can say how beautiful you are! I told Grace that the first time I ever met you. Body issues are like a normal day for me too, but we have to find our positive space and get to it fast. Dwelling in unrealistic expectations or unhealthy habits to be skinner is definitely not a great place to be. The great news is there is always tomorrow, so even if you are having a negative day, start tomorrow brand new and try to do something that makes you feel good and fosters good vibes!

  2. Jess Low says:

    I have sadly not commented until now but having found your diary section it has made me so incredibly happy, since these words have come for me at just the right time!

    As a fellow blogger (who isn’t these days?) its always shocking how much weight (On the medium sized girl) can affect us not only day to day but also how it can affect us on our blogs and our content. Its funny on the timing front since only last week I had a week off of outfit posts for the very reason that I didn’t feel the right size to be photographed! It feels completely foolish looking back on it – But I also know now that I needed that week off of outfits to get a little perspective that everything is good size regardless, so thank you for this post and your candor.

    I really love this part of your blog! I think you’re on to something incredible here!

    Jess

    • paperyrain says:

      Jess,
      First off, thank you so much for the kind words, it means so much you took time to comment! 🙂
      Secondly, I think sometimes we all need a recharge. I had just written a blog post about how I was coming back to the blog full time after a big break and then I didn’t blog again until yesterday. I just wasn’t ready and had to get my mind right and only you can know when you are ready.
      Thirdly, I checked your blog out and you are beautiful, so if you ever doubt yourself remember that! I obviously know how difficult it can be, I deal with it all the time, but that’s why we have our support systems! You can add me into yours! 🙂
      Thanks again for commenting! xoxo

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